Anti-Bad Boss Tactic Number One: Don’t Take It Personally!

When researchers Leslie Velsor and Van Velsor  looked at studies across different organizations and different employees, they found that failed managers had certain things in common.

Two of these are of particular interest when it comes to Bad Bosses:

According to the Veslors, failed managers have:

“Poor interpersonal skills. Horrible managers look down on you from on high like irascible emperors. They are insensitive, cold and as likely to be nice to you as give their pay-checks to charity.

“Can't get the work done. They repeatedly set overly ambitious targets and then repeatedly fail to meet them. They don't follow through on their promises and they're likely to betray your trust.”

Let’s review: An arrogant boss who doesn’t care about how you feel or what you think, loads you up with impossible projects/deadlines, doesn’t support you with resources or guidance, and--just to finish this off from my research--blames you when the project/deadline falls through.

OK! That pretty much defines Bad Bosses in a nutshell. 

Now that you know the problem, what are you going to do about it?

First thing I would suggest, is that you quit taking anything your Bad Boss does personally. In other words, it’s not because you are somehow deficient, defective, untalented or unskilled that your Bad Boss behaves the way he or she does. It’s because that’s who your Bad Boss is.

So when you get blamed, hassled or otherwise made miserable, as long as you’ve done the very best you know how, remind yourself: “It’s not me, it’s my horrible boss.”

Your self-esteem will thank you.

Find Meaning in Your Work--for a Healthier, Happier You!

Finding meaning in what you do, day after day is important--not just to a personal sense of fulfillment, but even to your health.

Studies show that people who don’t have a sense of meaning in their lives are far more likely to exhibit the chronic pro-inflammatory stress response, a condition which is associated with life-threatening diseases like heart disease and even cancer.

However, a Bad Boss is highly unlikely to give you a sense of meaning or purpose in your work. He or she is more likely to give you a sense of defeat, uselessness and a serious case of “whatever.”

“What if you work in place where management is unaware or unconcerned that it could do more to infuse the daily grind with a higher sense of purpose?” asks Monique Valcour,, a professor at EDHEC Business School. She goes on to suggest: “You learn to make your work more meaningful yourself. While it helps enormously to have conditions in place that facilitate work meaning (like autonomy in deciding how you do your work), it's important to realize that meaning is ultimately something you create on your own.”

There it is. Meaning is something you create on your own.

You look at the product your company creates, or the service it provides, and think of those who benefit from it.

You think about the benefit of your paycheck, how it keeps a roof over your head and helps provide for your family.

You challenge yourself to be the very best at your job, not to make your Bad Boss happy, but because striving to be the best you can be gives meaning and purpose to whatever you do.

Meaning. It’s what it’s all about.

Counter Your Bad Boss’s Negative Brain-Washing--With the Chill Factor!

If you listen to your Bad Boss long enough, you may start to believe his or her blather. Especially the part where your boss is telling you that you’re not good enough, you’ll never make it, you’re a loser, you’re laughable, you’ll never make the grade . . . need I go on?

Believe what your Bad Boss says and you may change the functioning of your brain for the worse! You may find yourself becoming more negative, anxious, insecure. These are not winner traits.

But the good news is that you can keep your brain functioning the way you want it to--on an optimistic, positive, self-confident track--simply by taking a few moments to meditate.

According to scientists Andrew Newberg, M.D. & Mark Robert Waldman: “… it takes less than two months to alter the overall neural functioning of the brain. This is amazing because it demonstrates that we have the power to consciously change our brains, and improve our neural functioning, in far less time than scientists used to think... we can see permanent changes in single neurons in a matter of days, and as other studies have shown, most forms of meditation will create subtle but significant changes in a couple of months.”

Meditation doesn’t have to be a big deal--with incense, New Age music and your legs pretzeled into lotus position. Just take a deep breath, allow your eyes to close, and follow your breath as it moves gently in and out for a minute or two. That qualifies as meditation.

Whenever you feel your Bad Boss’s negativity over-riding your natural good feelings, chill with a moment of meditation, and keep your brain functioning the way you want it to.